Be YOU and not who someone else wants you to be. If you are right with your maker, the opinion of others is irrelevant.
I pride myself on being an open book. I’m not proud of the mistakes that I’ve made. On the flip side, I’m not scared to own them and share them.
I’ve told you more than once that I know I am flawed but thankfully I’m loved by a savior who sees past all of that, no matter what I do. He is who matters.
For whatever reason, as humans, we desire to be liked by all. Truth of the matter is, some people just aren’t going “get you.” That’s ok, ya know why? Because there are people that you’re just not gonna “get” either. It is what it is.
DO NOT change your “character” depending on your “audience.” If someone else is trying to write your story for you, frankly, they are not worth your time. If you are trying to be the author of someone else’s story, shame on you! You aren’t worth their time.
So much of my life has been wasted trying to be the glue that holds so many relationships together. It’s like pissing in the wind folks and frankly, I’m kinda sick of being soak and wet. Many of you can relate. I know because some of you have shared a few pages of your story with me.
How are you supposed to handle said ghostwriters? I’ve no clue! You have to do you and I have to do me.
I have to ask myself, is the troublesome relationship worth the pain and heartache? I’ve prayed and asked for guidance and I keep coming back to the following scriptures: Proverbs 22: 23-24 and Proverbs 15:1-33. I’m torn because the advice in those scriptures are quite different.
I “thought” I knew the right approach to some recent situations, only to get slapped smack in the face, figuratively of course. I’m not claiming that my way was right, by any means. Heck, I’m flying by the seat of my pants here.
I can stomach someone not “getting me.” I don’t like it. I don’t understand it. I think I’m a decent person with good intentions. Kinda fun to be around. A pretty cool chic.
But I can stomach it. The problem with my complacency is once I get to “that point” it often surfaces in the form of an erupting volcano of ugliness. You know what I’m talking about. You know you do.
On the other hand, if someone attacks one of my people because they don’t “get them and can’t accept them for who they are, flaws and all, I refuse to stomach it any longer. It pains, no it ticks me off, me when someone expects one of my people to conform to their ideals. That is where I have decided to draw the line in the sand, as of late.
I have several family members and friends who lean a little more left, or in some cases, a lot farther left than I do. Ya know what, agree to disagree. There is no sensible reason to even “go there.” I can either accept their beliefs or cut them loose and vice versa.
There are people who attempt to pray me and my people into their idea of submission or a relationship with their savior. Truth be known, we serve the very same savior however, with very different ideals of His nature. I respect my savior but do not live in fear of a good smitin’ at the first, second or one hundredth transgression. I have fostered a relationship with Him in which He is my Heavenly Father. I don’t believe a loving father desires his child to fear smiting based on their every move. If you are a believer, please, focus on your relationship with Christ versus all the religious crap. Instill the relationship not the religion in your kids. “Religion” tends to bog down the relationship. I’ve seen it first hand. Legalism puts a bad taste in the mouths of struggling folks.
I’ve resigned myself to the fact that it is OK to let go of toxic people. Or in some instances, have limited contact. If I am of a toxic nature in someone’s life, I would expect the same, if a balance can’t be struck. Heck, I guess it’s akin to that “fool me once shame on me, fool me twice, shame on you mentality.” I’ve allowed myself to be fooled more than twice, I assure you. I have told myself, I have to forgive and soldier on because that is what a good Christian girl does. Bite my tongue and move on. Ya know, turn the other cheek. At what point do you let go? I’m guessin’ once your tongue is a bloody pulp from all the bitin’ and a useless mass of mush.
The precipice of letting go will be different for you and me. The important similarity that I would like to draw “betwixt” us is the ruminatin’ that needs to commence.
Ruminatin’ regarding the way we treat people. Are we forcing our religious or political views on others only to leave them with a bitter taste in their mouth? Are we trying to write another’s story for them?
Ruminatin’ regarding the way we let other people treat us. Are we allowing someone else to write our story? Are we stomaching relationships that are toxic? How’s your tongue fairing these days?
Ruminatin’ regarding the way we let others treat our people. Are we enabling “ghostwriters?” Are we bitin’ our tongue when we should be speaking on behalf of our people?
We are all going to come to our own solution. Some will even continue with the status quo. If you do, please don’t complain. You have a choice.
Keeping It Wonky and Real – One Day At A Time!